There are three types of people you'll come across in your life; the people who stay, the people who leave, and the people who longer.
People who leave are pretty easy to distinguish. For the most, they leave your life and disappear completely. If you're not ready for that, you are the one trying to pull them back into your life. You are reaching out, trying to make contact but there really isn't a response. If you're still holding on to a ghost, let them go. People leave your life all the time. As you may not want it, it's time to move them into you're "gone" group.
Then we have the people who stay. Again, pretty easy for the most part to understand who they are. These people came into your life, and probably never left once. These are the people you can count on for anything. These people care about you and want the best for you. They will do anything they can to see you smile. If you go to them for something or just to talk, they're there. There's no doubt in your mind these people are in your life.
The other type, would be the lingerers. These people are usually hard to determine. They're in and out of your life constantly. Sometimes when you need them, they aren't there. When it's convenient for them, they'll be there for sure and usually with a motive. These people are probably using you for whatever reasons and don't seem to really care. Yet, you let them in every time because it's who you are.
I'm here to say, it's ok to let them go. As it's hard, the best thing may be to cut them off. Next time they come around looking for something, don't respond. If you're not good enough any other time, why should you be that one time? Don't be. No one likes people who linger. So change that.
People should either be IN or OUT of your life. There is no inbetween. You will find so much more peace in your life when you stop letting people confuse or use you.
Do any of your clothes include rayon, or made of 100% rayon? You probably know because it's the damn comfiest clothing you own.
I've started buying more clothing recently that is either all rayon or 95% rayon and some spandex. Best decisions of my life. Not only are these clothes comfortable, but they are also sometimes dressy.
I own maxi skirts and dresses that are made of rayon and I love them. Not only can I wear these day to day, but I can wear them to work and be comfortable at work. Having to dress up for work, I've found that I'd rather be comfortable all day.
With these clothing items, I can be professional and comfortable at the same time. Oh and did I mention stylish? Palazzo pants often are made of this too.
Are you online ordering yet? There are skirts you can purchase for $15-$20 made of rayon. I found a dress at old navy for $15 and I love it.
These items are often colorful too. As you can find them in solids, you can find them in various patterns to mix it up.
This is in style. This is comfortable. This is practical. This is the shit.
If you weren't clued in, you heard it from me!
As I was growing up, I felt like I always needed to depend on someone. I thought that I always needed to be around someone, be constantly talking to someone, or it would be like I didn't exist. Like I didn't matter.
For all my life, I would go through depressed states where I felt alone. My loneliness would overcome my entire mood, and I would wonder why I was even here.
My fear of being alone was so strong for the first 18 years of my life. I never wanted to go anywhere alone, I'd find someone to go with me. I felt awkward sitting alone places. Being alone anywhere made me anxious.
As time went on, I learned to do things alone. I didn't always need to, but I could do it. I eventually got to a place where I could eat in public places alone and often prefer to shop solo.
There was still one problem; I felt I needed so many friends and to be in contact or hang out with said friends often. This is one of my biggest insecurities I've dealt with and for the most part overcame.
I came to terms with it finally after all these years, I'm a loner, an independent. I don't spend most days with people to just be around people, I spend time with me and I'm ok with that.
I love my friends and spending time with them when I can, don't get me wrong. No longer though will I chase after so called friends. Never again will I put so much on the line to keep a friend who does not care. I am perfectly ok with the people in my life and any that come along who prove to care.
Recently, I have learned to love my life. I enjoy being somewhat independent and I'm happy with who I have in my life. I still suffer from being insecure and occasionally depressed, but I hope to kick them to the curb someday.
Not everyone lives the same life. You may spend all your time with friends, or you may spend a lot of time alone. Whoever you are, learn to love that life and who you are. If you don't accept it, you'll have a hard time being happy.
If you are the loner type and do things solo, embrace it! Try more things by yourself and spend time with you. You'll learn more than you knew about yourself than before!
Chelsea Blake: My views on life and writing whatever my heart desires.