Published on Finding Bohemia
How many times when you were a child were you told by your parents, “Honesty is the best policy?” Don’t lie, you were taught better than that.
We are taught at a young age that lying is bad and there are consequences to your actions, yet we lie in everyday life. I, however, prefer to be told the truth straight up. That doesn’t seem to be so easy when it comes to the men I’ve dealt with in my life though.
I cannot begin to tell you how many times I’ve looked a man in the eyes and said “Look, just be honest with me from the beginning. No lies, because when I find out, and I will, it’ll be 100 times worse.” Yes, I pretty much use the same speech every time. It’s pretty simple if you ask me.
Despite my efforts, time and time again, men continue to lie. Whether they choose to bend the truth about how they feel on a matter, hide that they are seeing another woman, or whatever other bullshit thing they feel the need to not share; it’s uncalled for.
Here’s the deal fellas; if a woman asks you to be honest with her, just do it. When I tell you it’s cool that you’re seeing other people, it really is. When you lie about the smallest thing and later I learn it was a lie, I will be genuinely pissed solely because you lied, not concerning whatever the matter may be.
Women want honesty in a man, simple as that. I will praise a man who can tell me the truth over a man who feels the need to be shady anyday. I’m an honest person and I say what I feel, no matter how a man will react. Am I putting myself out there too much and embarrassing myself? Maybe, but dammit I will choose to be honest everyday rather than fake who I am and what I want.
Men, stop being so afraid to put yourself out there and be honest about who you are and how you feel. You will gain a hell of a lot more respect from women if you just put everything on the line and show your true colors from the start.
Give honesty a try, please. Just once, see what happens when you tell the truth from the beginning. It could really change how much respect a person has for you and the relationship you have with someone.
Ok, so you're in your 20s, and let's also say you're single. You've lived out half of your 20s and have watched your friends and acquaintances your age get married, receive promotions at their dream jobs, and pop out kid or two. Here you are though, slaving away at the job you don't care much for, going home at night to spend time with yourself (or if you're lucky a night with your friends,) to cuddle yourself to sleep just to wake up and do it all again. Yes, I'm talking about my life.
I'm not afraid to admit that I've compared myself to friends and others who are "further" in their lives than I am. Looking at their lives, I would, and still sometimes do, wonder why I'm not there yet. I ask myself, " what did I do in order to fall so behind in life?" Then within the next breath, mentally slap myself across for the face for even letting my mind go there.
Behind in life? Chelsea, what are you even saying? Like, we are not on a strict timeline here where we must be married by this age or we are doomed to be single for life. That's not how life works.
Ok yes, it does seem like a lot of people fall into a certain age range to do the whole marriage and kids thing. That does not mean we all fall into that slot though. Who said being average or " on time" was cool? Certainly not me.
We live in a different time, a different generation. Sure we have friends our age who stick true to the average timeline I've mentioned, but it's ok not to. It is much more acceptable in this day and age to stay single through your 20s than say 50 years ago. The times change and so do we.
Look, our lives all play out differently. We never know what will happen next or even what's right around the corner waiting for us. Comparing ourselves to others is only going to set us back mentally and refrain us from having a good time and moving forward in life. Getting stuck in a rut is the last thing we want at our age. Once we get stuck, it's just all that much harder to get out.
So I'm here to tell you, you are where you are supposed to be in life. Do not let someone else's timeline affect your outlook on your own life. Yes, we may want our lives to be different than they are at this point in life, but we cannot rush that. Also, why rush? We have our entire lives ahead of us to accomplish our goals and wants. There is no reason we have to complete everything before we turn 30. Pump the brakes, sit back for a moment, and enjoy your damn life with where it is right now.
The next time you even try to look at your life and get down about where it is in that moment, remember that you are not alone in thinking that. Remind yourself that you are young and you do have time. Being happy with where you are in life is very important in being able to achieve the next goal you set out to complete. You will get there, all in due time.
Ok, so as I stated in my previous post, I pierced my daith to attempt to eliminate migraines, if not eliminate them completely. It's been 11 days since I've pierced it so I'll catch you up on how it's working so far.
Rumor has it that the daith piercing acts as an acupuncture treatment to relieve pressure and eliminate migraines. I've read and heard that it's worked for several people upon getting it pierced so I'm excited to see how it works for me.
With my migraines, usually but not always, occurring on the right side of my head and eye, I chose to pierce the right ear, thinking that may be helpful. I haven't read anything about if the side you pierce matters especially if you often have one sided migraines, but I thought, "makes sense to me." I have to say it relieved a bit of pressure from the start, I was surprised.
Along with the piercing, I'm trying to keep up with a daily journal regarding my migraines. In this journal, I've just been taking down the date, what I eat in that day, if I get a headache/migraine, and what I take for it. I'm trying to see if I can pinpoint if any certain foods are affecting me and keep track of how often I'm taking medication for them and hopefully try to eliminate that.
Within the first week, there was no migraine. This isn't completely a surprise though. I get around 13-17 migraines within the month, but that doesn't mean they are spread out evenly. I can go a week without a single one, and the following one week I will get one every single day. They are so unpredictable at times.
Even though I didn't have a migraine, I did have a couple headaches that week. I had forgotten what headaches are like. Any headache I've gotten in the past few years has turned into a migraine. The fact that these were simple headaches made me so happy! I felt like a semi-normal person, who didn't seem drained, pissy, or rude because a migraine was taking over.
Yesterday marked 10 days of having the piercing. I had a rough night so I didn't sleep very long or well. I woke up not feeling too great. By the time I had gotten to work I had a headache. I took some ibuprofen hoping that would stop it but unfortunately it didn't. I ended up with a horrible migraine. As I had been doing for the past year, I split my pain reliever in half. I had to take the second half once an hour had gone by with no relief.
It may have went away had I been home and able to rest, but with working every other weekend, it was my weekend to work so I didn't have a choice. At least it was able to give me relief for the remainder of the day. I will say, the down side to my medication is that an entire pill makes me extremely drowsy. Another reason I'd like to stop taking it.
Today is day 11. I've been feeling good all day. I got some decent sleep and haven't had a headache today. I'm someone who is bothered by keeping their hair in a ponytail or bun for too long of a period. It can actually give me headaches because of the tightness and it pulling on my head. I'm happy to report that my hair has now been in a bun for 8 hours! It may not seem like a big deal to some but its a great achievement for me.
So here I am, coming up on the two week mark here soon! I have high hopes and positive vibes going into this week for my migraines. Today started off pretty stressful for me but I made it through that with no migraine.
I will update when I can! I know a lot of people are wondering if the piercing helps so I really do want to help as many people as possible.
You wanna know what sucks. Migraines.
When I was 17, I got one of the worst headaches I could imagine. I remember thinking, "this pain is awful, why is this headache so much worse?" I didn't know much about migraines back then, but I knew it was a painful headache and I wanted it gone.
For the next couple years, I'd get the occasional migraine. I'd take some excedrin, lay down, and usually sleep it off. They didn't occur so often so it barely interfered with my life.
Eventually, they became more frequent and less bareable. Over the counter meds didn't help and sleeping was impossible. They kept me down and out too often, especially while I was trying to juggle college classes and a job.
I started seeing a neurologist five years ago. Within those years, I've tried a countless amount of preventive meds that did everything but prevent my migraines. I've tried a few pain relievers as well, one of which does work for me, aside from occasionally becoming too drowsy. I received Botox injections until my insurance no longer allowed it and have been trying them again. No luck yet.
I've read about different home remedies that can help a migraine but can't seem to get any of those to show results.
I don't want to be stuck on these medications for the rest of my life. The appointments and meds add up and the amount of money spent on this issue keeps rising. My insurance doesn't even allow for me to receive enough pain relievers in a month to manage my migraines anymore.
After reading about it on the internet and being told by several people I should give it a try, a pierced my daith yesterday.
I'm going to start a separate post to talk a little about the piercing and what I'm doing to pin point how my migraines start and if I'm able to prevent some of them.
So if you too, like me, suffer from migraines, follow my posts and maybe they will help you too!
For the sake of all women, I hope you made the right choice.
For the sake of our military, I hope you made the right choice.
For the sake of all races, all of the disabled, and the LGBTQ community, I hope you made the right choice.
For the sake of America, I really hope you made the right choice.
Donald Trump was elected president for 2016, leaving around half of America devastated and afraid.
We didn't expect much, with both candidates being less than America deserves, we really had to choose the lesser of two evils. With that, America was left divided on who that was and why. Who would make the better president? Who would further this country to be even more great than we ALREADY are.
Make America Great Again, my ass.
In my opinion, the obvious choice for me was Hillary. Poor Bernie, he really should have had a chance.
As a woman and someone who wants peace for this country, Trump has always scared me. In a country that is still striving for equality throughout, I believe that Trump was not the solution.
With being a woman, Trump has made me scared for my rights, and the rights of a future daughter. When he said that he would make abortion illegal with punishment to all woman, it blew my mind. I couldn't believe there was a man arrogant enough to tell me or any woman that she would be punished for choosing not to have a baby. You would think a man running for president of all people would understand over-population, women's' rights, or how many children are affected by abusive or negligent parents.
I've also seen him as a bully. A man who feels it's ok to mock the disabled. A man who believes we should build a wall to "protect" the country. A man who thinks he can treat women with disrespect and that is ok. He has been so focused on "crooked Hillary" that he has put more effort into attempting to incarcerate her, than his own election. We've campaigned with Obama against bullies, yet we elected one right into office.
Trump has some how been able to get quite the following during his campaign. As there are plenty of sane, great minded people who have their reasoning for choosing Trump, there is a great deal of close minded, hostile and arrogant followers. You know who I mean by this, the ones from a small town who think racism and bullying are still "cool." Look at a group of Trump supporters. How many of them are not well educated? How many of them still live in their home town with their parents? This is a good one, the ones who say democrats want everything for free, yet they were handed everything by their parents through high school and even after. How was that free, brand new car?
I could go on even more of rant and go into details but I won't. Trump is our president. America, you have made your choice.
Don't you dare say one bad thing about his decisions if you voted for him. You cannot take this back. Good or bad, he's with us for the next four years.
For the sake of our country, I hope he does well. I hope he moves past the racism, sexism, and bullying and actually makes good choices for America. This is it, I hope you're all right.
Chelsea Blake: My views on life and writing whatever my heart desires.